Back in grad school my very first class was called Human Behavior Through the Life Cycle. The big takeaway? Our physical, emotional, and social selves keep evolving from birth to very old age. Most theorists group the journey into five broad stages: infancy, childhood, adolescence, adulthood, and late adulthood.
After two decades as a counselor, I’ve noticed four specific slices of adulthood when people most often look for a listening ear or fresh feedback. Here’s a quick overview — and why each season can feel shaky.
Early Adulthood (20 – 40)
These years are all about carving out an identity separate from your family of origin. Even if you’ve lived on your own for a while (and maybe married), beliefs keep maturing as the brain finishes its last growth spurt. That inner shift can spark questions like “Do I really think the way I was raised to think?” or “What do I want my life to stand for?” It’s exciting—but the shake-up between independence and belonging can also feel uncomfortable.
Middle Adulthood (40 – 60)
Popular culture calls this the “mid-life crisis,” but it isn’t limited to sports cars or men. Reality checks pile up: teenagers test limits, marriages hit rough patches, a parent dies, or a health scare appears. Many people suddenly see that half their working years are behind them and wonder, “Is this the life I pictured?” A mix of loss, recalibration, and renewed purpose often shows up during this stretch.
Late Adulthood (60 – 80)
Retirement looks dreamy on paper, yet stepping away from a career can unsettle a person who has had their identity anchored in work for 40 years. Add shifting finances, new routines, and the possibility of a spouse’s illness or death, and it’s clear why this phase can prompt soul-searching. The question that echoes most: “Who am I now?”
Very Late Adulthood (80 +)
In the mid-80s and beyond, change can strike just as hard as earlier decades. Friends pass away, long-loved homes are traded for retirement communities, and everyday independence (driving, cooking, choosing your schedule) may shrink. Surrounded by reminders of mortality, many people grapple with grief, purpose, and control all at once.
Each transition brings its own hurdles, yet the underlying emotions—loss, hope, uncertainty, renewal—are universal. Knowing that others face similar waves can be a relief. With support from friends, family, faith communities, and sometimes a trained professional, we don’t just survive these chapters; we can reshape them into seasons of growth and meaning.
You’re not alone on this journey. CJFS offers professional counseling with licensed therapists who are accepting new clients. Support Groups are also available.
Visit cjfsbham.org to learn more or call 205-871-3438 to make an appointment with therapist.
